Just A Little Slip Up

As a writer, you've got a lot on your plate.
Main characters, supporting character, setting, time lines, plots, sub-plots, good dialogue, believable motives...

With all that weighing on your mind, it's pretty easy to overlook basic grammar rules, isn't it?

Well, lovelies, don't worry. It happens to the best of us.

Just for the record, up until about six months ago, I was using "peaked" when I was supposed to be using "piqued."

Yeah, I know. That's basic grade school stuff, but, honestly, I don't remember anyone ever teaching me about that little rule.

We'll all make mistakes like that from time to time--it's inevitable.

So, today we're taking this gravy train back to third grade--

We're going to be talking about some common slip ups.

*They're/Their/There*

-They're is a contraction for "there are."

Ex: "Where are Brady and Mitch?"

"They're already out in the water."

-Their is possessive.

Ex: "But isn't that their kayak?"

-There is used to identify a point in time or location.

Ex: "Oh, never mind, they're right over there."

"Good. For a second there, I thought the rapids got them."

*There's/Theirs*

-There's is a contraction for "there is."

Ex: "There's hardly any food left in the bag."

-Theirs is possessive.

Ex: "Leave that bag alone--it's theirs."

*Who's/Whose*

-Who's is a contraction for "who is."

Ex: "Who's in the kitchen?"

-Whose is possessive.

Ex: "Whose purse is that?"

*Peak/Peek/Pique*

-Peak is the highest point. (Like the top of a mountain)

Ex: "My anger was peaking."

-Peek is a quick look--a glance.

Ex: "He keeps peeking back at me from the front seat. It's making me uncomfortable."

-Pique is what you say when someone arouses your interest.

Ex: "My interest in the story piqued when he said Davy had been missing for a week."

*Cloth/Clothe/Clothes*

-Cloth is what your clothes are made of.

Ex: "I found some really pretty cloth at the craft store."

-Clothe is the action of putting clothes on someone.

Ex: "She was clothed in a form-fitting red evening gown."

-Clothes are what you're wearing right now.

Ex: "She spent every dime she had on new clothes."

*Breath/Breathe*

-Breath is what you're taking right now.

Ex: "My breath caught in my throat as another loud knock rang out through the house."

-Breathe is the action of taking that breath.

Ex: "I breathe evenly, trying to get a handle on everything that's going on."

*That*

Whenever you type "that," step back and ask yourself, "Do I really need that word?" Most of the time, you won't. And if you don't need it, cut it. You have to cut out every single unnecessary word in your manuscript. Every. Single. One.

For example: "He just couldn't understand that I didn't need him anymore."

Okay, pretty good, right?

Now let's try it like this: "He just couldn't understand I didn't need him anymore."

You get my point, right?

*He murmured/She screamed*

I've touched on this one quite a few times. When using dialogue tags, it's best to just use "said." But, personally, I'm not really a fan of dialogue tags--I prefer action beats. I'm not sure about you, but I like to be able to see what the characters are doing while they're talking. Are they moving their hands or playing with their hair?

My advice with dialogue tags is, basically, cut them out wherever you can.

For more dialogue advice, click this.

*And then...*

I see quite a few people write "and then this happened." Don't do that--it breaks the rhythm in your sentence. You don't need both "and" and "then." Pick the one you like and cut the other.

For example, "Walking casually toward the coffee shop, Tiffany stopped to enjoy some flowers growing a few feet away. And then, suddenly, a man appeared, snatching her purse and taking off down the street."

"Walking casually toward the coffee shop, Tiffany stopped to enjoy some flowers growing a few feet away. Then, suddenly, a man appeared, snatching her purse and taking off down the street."

See how that second one flows a little more smoothly when you read it?

*Towards*

I find that a lot of writers--especially me and my American pals--write "towards" when we should be writing "toward." This is just one of those nit picky rules though. I'm sure there aren't any publishers out there rejecting novels because the author used "towards." But, still, it looks a little more professional (and reads a little more fluently) if you drop the S.

*Lots of really, really, really LONG sentences*

This is another thing that breaks the rhythm in your writing. Readers stumble over long sentences. They have to go back and reread them to understand what you were trying to say. I read Howl's Moving Castle recently and I absolutely loved it, but the one thing that bugged me was the overly long sentences. There weren't many of them--thank God--but the ones that were there really killed me. I usually had to read over them two or three times to understand everything. And it wasn't because they were bad sentences--it was because they were overly long.

*Watch your tenses*

I'm going to do a post soon about the difference in perspectives and how to pick the right one for your story, but for now, let me just say, keep an eye on your tenses. If I'm writing in past tense, I constantly find myself slipping back into present tense.

"I was walking passed the bank when I see Mark's car whiz by."

Keep an eye out for things like that. It can really break a novel.

Hope this helped. If you've got any questions or want to suggest a topic, leave a comment and I'll get right on it!

Happy writing, lovelies.

I'M NOT BEING MELODRAMATIC!!!

Ooooh, melodrama.

As a writer, you want to create some emotional tension in your writing, but you don't want to cross that very thin line into melodrama.

But what is melodrama and when do I know I've crossed that line?

Lovelies, I regret to say it's pretty easy to cross that invisible line. I know I slathered Lights Out in melodrama. But, don't fret--it's also pretty easy to fix.

So, let me set the scene for you....

Our heroine--we'll call her uh...May--has an amazing pink cellphone. She got it as a present from her mother three years ago and she's adored it ever since. She holds her life in those tiny, plastic walls--all her friends' numbers, videos she took at that wild party last week, pictures that span the three years she's had it. It's all in there.

Not long ago, her boyfriend--Trav...er...Trevor--broke his cellphone and now they can't get in touch with each other while he's out. Well, May doesn't like the idea of not being able to pick up the phone and call Trevor whenever she wants, so she decides he can take her precious phone for a while, but only if he promises to be extra careful.

Of course, he keeps that promise for a few days and things go rather smoothly. But, late one evening as Trevor is riding home after a dinner with his family, he gets frustrated with his siblings and leaves the phone laying carelessly on the backseat. Somewhere along the ride, one of those siblings picks it up and tries to put it in a safer place--the empty cup holder. They miss and plunk! May's precious cellphone ends up floating at the bottom of a glass of flat Pepsi.

Hours later, when Trevor discovered the phone, he knows right away May won't be happy, but he wasn't expecting half of what actually happened. Upon returning the phone, May breaks down in tears.

"How could you be so careless?" she bawls, falling to her knees with the sticky phone still clenched in her fist. "All my numbers...my pictures! They're all gone!"

Trevor bites his lip. "But...I...it was--"

"You're an idiot! Why did I let you take it? Oh, God! It's all gone!" Tears roll down her cheeks as she throws the ball of gloop that was her phone across the room. "It's all gone!"

Now, when did you start rolling your eyes?

That's melodrama.

Melodramatic characters make readers say, "Yeah, right." They make them laugh at inappropriate times. And, really, you don't want your readers snickering as they read things in your book they're supposed to take to heart.

There is, of course, an exception to this "rule."

Comedy.

If you're writing comedy, go right ahead and let your characters be a little melodramatic from time to time.

But I don't write comedy--I'm no good at writing something purely for the lulz--so I can't help you there.

Things to avoid:

-Shouting, screaming, bawling, sobbing....

Watch out for those words and words like them. Yeah, it's a lot easier to just type "He yelled", but it's stronger--and less melodramatic--if you find another way to show that emotion. For more tips on showing, check this out.

-The exclamation point (!)

This little punctuation mark is very rarely needed. It's a gateway straight to Melodrama City. It shows up all over the place in Lights Out, but I'm gonna change all that in editing.

Instead of relying on the exclamation point to show your character is angry/excited/speaking loudly/whatever, show that your character is angry/excited/speaking loudly/whatever. Embrace things like "clenched fists" and "gritted teeth."

-Oh, what a coincidence....

Not really melodramatic, but it's definitely something that makes your reader go, "Ugh." Let's say you're writing a crime novel and the whole plot hinges on your hero finding a bit of evidence that the police just happened to overlook...

Or maybe you're writing a fantasy and your heroine saves everyone with an amazing power she had NO IDEA she even had....

No!

Your reader will just roll their eyes stuff like that. Avoid it if you want readers to take your writing seriously.

-But why the hell did he do that?

Some writers like to think their readers don't notice when they're manipulating their characters into doing things they wouldn't normally do, but, no matter how good you are, you can't hide from the watchful eye of a good reader. If, suddenly, your hero starts acting like a great guy after a hundred pages of cold aloofness, your reader is going to raise an eyebrow. Let's say you're writing a romance and your MC's sister just adored your MC's cool chick friend up until the point they started dating. If you want to pull that card, okay, but you've GOT to paint a believable picture to explain her sudden hatred for this girl. If you don't, your reader will notice that she's acting out of character and they'll have some questions.

-I'll die without you!

Yep, this is a melodrama's signature statement. Heroines that go around screaming about how they'll just DIE without the hero grates on my nerves like nothing else in this world. Please, please, please--for the love of GOD--don't do that in your story. Oh, crap...I feel a New Moon reference coming on...ugh...gotta try to...repress it...

Aw, it's no use.

You remember in New Moon when Edward played relationship hookie? Bella freaked out, didn't she? She fell into a depression that lasted for SEVERAL MONTHS over a boy she'd only known for...what...about a year? Maybe?

Could anyone honestly read that bit without laughing a little or at least rolling your eyes? If anyone--ANYONE--can look me in my face and tell me they'd do the same thing, I wouldn't have any problem laughing hysterically back at you.

**Quick note**

I've seen a few people type screaming in all caps (like the title of this post), and I'd just like to make it a point to say: Cut that shit out. It's just wrong. The caps lock key doesn't belong in your writing.

Hope this helped. If you've got any questions or want to suggest a topic for a future post, just leave a comment and I'll get right on it!

Happy writing, lovelies!

World Building Super Fun Time

I want to do a special post in honor of all the hard work Travis and I put in building the world for my new book, Home Base.

I've really got to hand it to Trav on this one--I couldn't have done it without him.

Well, maybe I could have, but it wouldn't have been nearly as much fun :)

So, here you are writing about a fictional dimension and you've got to make it as real/believable as you possibly can.

Seems a little overwhelming, doesn't it?

I mean...you've got to come up with different countries and for each of those countries you'll also need to develop a currency, a government, a class system, and a million other things that all seem a little trivial.

Well, let me tell you now:

It might seem trivial, but it's not.

Even if those aspects don't show up much in your story, as the writer, you need to know it all like the back of your hand.

So, where should I start?

--The first thing you need to do is grab a partner. This is NOT a requirement, but it certainly makes things easier. A good partner is someone who cares about your writing and actually listens. Make sure you're not trying to bounce ideas off someone who waits to talk. You won't get anywhere. You need someone who will take in everything you're saying and ask questions.

The more questions they ask, the better.

Travis makes a great world building partner. While he doesn't read often, he loves to help me with my writing and is always chockfull of questions. Find someone like that. And make sure they're actually interested so you're not just talking their ear off.

**Note** If you're in need of a good world building partner, just leave a comment and I'll be happy to help you out :D

--Next, you need to get a basic idea of your country's layout and draw up some maps. This IS a requirement, but having drawing skills is NOT. My map of Thiciia--the country Home Base takes place in--is very rough. Lots of odd squares and rectangles.

There's nothing wrong with that. No one ever said you had to know how to draw maps to write. You just need a basic idea.

--Now, we can start thinking about your country's terrain. Is it mountainous or flat land? How much vegetation is there? What's the soil like? How about the weather? What are the seasons like? Does the landscape change with each season?

Ask yourself things like that. (Hopefully your partner is asking those types of questions)

While you're thinking about terrain, think about what sort of civilization you're working with. Is it a small village or a cityscape? How technologically advanced are they? What sort of medicines do they use?

--How about your country's government? Here's where things start to get interesting. I just looooove thinking about governments. It's a very intriguing part of world building. You get to think about whether or not the people are fond of their government, how much outside media/influence the government allows in, what sort of laws they have, what sorts of freedoms/limitations they put on their citizens. The list goes on.

A good partner will have lots of questions about this part.

Another thing you can look into while thinking about government is currency. Is it a barter system or do they use actual money? In Thiciia, they use chunks of a precious mineral--Renylum--as currency. The bigger your bar, the more money it's worth.

--What about the higher class and common people? Do clothes differ between classes? How about their mode of transportation? In Home Base, only the ruling family is allowed to have automobiles. Everyone else--including the higher class--has to travel by foot.

And, while this doesn't apply for all stories, you should think about slave labor. My MC in Home Base is an escaped slave. When dealing with slaves, you need to think about why your country would need them. In Thiciia, the slaves are used to work in the Renylum mines. Mining for Renylum is very dangerous and not many people would volunteer to do it, so, naturally, the Lowe family--the royal bloodline--shipped in slaves to do it instead.

--What kinds of animals do your citizens keep? Another thing I love is coming up with new types of animals. The one hard thing about this is coming up with things to call them. It's the one thing that keeps me from doing it more often.

Annnnyway, back on topic.

Do your citizens keep these animals as livestock or pets? What do these animals look like? What do they eat? Is this their natural habitat or have they been transplanted?

It's okay if you want to be a little uncreative here and base your creations on real animals. Look at animals in the real world and manipulate them a little bit. And it's perfectly alright if a little of the base animal shows through. Just have fun.

Alright everyone! I hope that helped.

If you've got any question or have a suggestion for a future topic, just leave a comment and I'll do my best to cover it!

Love you guys!

Saturday Stuff

Well, I'm still in the midst of writer's block. But not an overall block, just a block with Ophelia.

Sucks, huh?

But I'm not worried.

I'm just going to put that on the back burner until I find my muse and work on something else in the meantime.

I've been itching to write a dystopia-type book lately.

It's going to be set in a fictional universe, so I'm just working on world-building for now.

I know the MC is going to be a boy--probably in his late teens or early twenties--and that he was born in slavery, but that's about it.

I know a lot about the country it's set in though.

I'm going to call it Thiciia (name borrowed from a failed project).

It's ruled by a "royal bloodline" (the Lowe family) and they use a certain rare mineral as currency (haven't come up with a definite name yet).

Within Thiciican territory, there are two main settlements--"The City," where the largest mineral mines are located, and "The Florincia Work Camp," where slaves who have made numerous escape attempts are sent.

I'm not going to go into all the details.

That would take up too much space.

But let me just say I'm really pleased with what I've got so far.

I'm having a little trouble coming up with things to call the animals though.

They're going to be heavily based on creatures from our world, but I wanna call them something completely different.

I'm working with a few creatures at the moment and I need names to all of them.

I've got these huge rat-like creatures. They're a big part of the Thiciian diet (at least for the common people. The Lowe family and the well-to-do have most of their meat imported from other countries)

And then there are these big, hairless dog-like animals that live within the city.

Outside the city limits, there are going to be a few small rodents and several larger reptiles (snakes/lizards).

Well, I'm gonna get back to work.

Just thought I'd let you all know I'm still alive.

And I will be blogging regularly again soon.

(Someone, quick, suggest a topic for me! I'm running out of ideas!)

Bad Blogger!

I'm sorry I've been sort of slacking off with my posts, guys.

I've been pretty busy.

Editing LIGHTS OUT, trying to fix OPHELIA so I can get back to work, and, our newest project, tiling the floor in the bathroom.

Yeah, I told myself I wasn't going to start editing LIGHTS OUT for a while--at least until I got feedback from my beta readers--but I got that itch.

Just couldn't help myself :)

I've been thinking about reworking the first few chapters so (my readers know what I'm talking about) all that stuff about the hospital and the police aren't there anymore.

I'm actually almost done putting that patch on OPHELIA.

Basically, I needed to add a scene and include a very subtle time skip to get that little red ball rolling again.

I should be back on track soon.

Oh! Speaking of Ophelia, I'm drawing a little picture of her.

Yeah...don't tell anyone, but I draw crappy pictures in my spare time. (Interested? There's a link to my deviantART account in the sidebar)

And I've had a bit of spare time recently.

I will be posting it on my dA account when I'm done, but if you want me to post it here to so you guys can get a look at her, I will.

And as for the bathroom floor....

Well, I just woke up yesterday to find out Dad had ripped all the carpet up...

Home improvements....

Bleh.