Before kicking off this week's Tipster Tuesday post, I'd just like to say I feel like megacrap. My stomach is killing me. I didn't get any writing done today. I did a lot of reading though--started and nearly finished the sixth Demonata book. Had to do something to take my mind off the nearly-crippling stabbing pain in my guts. Meh...
ON TO BUSINESS!
Today's Topic:
Awesome First Scenes
Awesome First Scenes
Of all the scenes in your book, the first scene is (arguably) the most important. It's what hooks your potential reader and makes them want to read on. When I'm in a book store and see a book that piques my interest, I read the first few paragraphs to see if it grabs my attention. If it does, it goes in my "TOTALLY GONNA BUY THIS" pile (it's a very exclusive pile), but if it doesn't...it's going right back on the shelf where I found it.
Your first scene needs to grab the reader and shake them, demanding they read the rest. It's got to be powerful and compelling, but it's also got to make us care about the MC and their problems. It's got to draw us in, make us care, and compel us forward in the story. Whoo...sounds like a doozy, huh?
What makes your first scene awesome?
--Grab us quickly
It's best to put something interesting in the first few sentences to give the reader an impression of what to expect from the story. Something that catches their attention and makes them ask questions. (If they've got questions, they'll probably want answers.) I grabbed a few books from my room before starting, so let's take a look at their first few sentences.
"Something heavy on my center, smooth against my skin, shifting very slightly within itself, stretched and retracted. Occasionally a tap to the side, always in the same spot. I breathed. Instantly the thing was still." THE GARDEN by Elsie V. Aidinoff.
This works for me. I want to know what this "thing" is and why it's on the MC. Based purely on this, I would read on.
"After looking everywhere in the house, Alayna found Kiera in the barn, talking to the horses. Alayna knew that--given the chance--most children of five years would talk to horses. But Kiera was crying, sobbing, her voice coming out in gasps and hiccups, barely able to get the words out, and what she was saying to the horses was 'No, I'm sorry. I couldn't tell. But something terrible.'" THE BOOK OF MORDRED by Vivian Vande Velde.
What's wrong with the little girl? Why's she crying? What's she talking about? What's terrible? With so many questions that need answering, of course I'd keep reading!
"'I see...' said the vampire thoughtfully, and slowly he walked across the room towards the window. For a long time he stood there against the dim light from Divisadero Street and the passing beams of traffic. The boy could see the furnishings of the room more clearly now, the round oak table, the chairs." INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE by Anne Rice.
Sorry, Anne, but this is a no-go. Had I just picked this up at a book store, I probably would've put it back down. I actually have read it and, while a little flowery and over-written in place, I do really love the book. But these first few sentences don't give me any sense of approaching action/danger/compelling stuff.
"Double history on a Wednesday afternoon--total nightmare! A few minutes ago, I would have said I couldn't imagine anything worse. But when there's a knock at the door, and it opens, and I spot my Mom outside, I realize--life can always get worse." LORD LOSS by Darren Shan.
Oooh! How can life always get worse? What's going to happen? Also, you see how this started with the MC talking about his distaste for double history periods? That's something teenagers (the target audience) can relate to. Way to go! Now I feel connected to the MC!
"My name is Nicolette Dazincourt DeLande, and I have committed murder. How do you synopsize a life, I wonder, cut it back and down, hacking into it like an untamed wisteria, rampant with lavender blooms, tendrils all coiled around and choking. How do you trim and clip the lush foliage of a life, making it docile and compliant, conformed to a foreign shape and structure." BETRAYAL by Gwen Hunter.
Oh yeah! You had me at "and I have committed murder." Great job, Miss Hunter. You've pulled me in right off the bat. And then you come at me with this awesomely pretty language?! I can't read on quick enough!
--Let's see some action
I love fast-paced, action-packed stories. So when the action kicks off on the first page, it makes for a very happy Kristina. I can't stand a book that spends its first few pages doing nothing but giving back story and descriptions. That being said, it's perfectly fine to just hint at the action, but at least let me know it's on its merry little way.
--Make a connection
Give me something to connect with the MC on. Like in LORD LOSS with Grubbs calling his double history period a "nightmare." With his opinion and the way he put it out there, I could tell right away that I would like Grubbs. While I actually enjoyed history in school, I knew how he felt and could sympathize with his double history problem.
--Give me something to sink my teeth into
So don't start out with a dream. Sorry, but that's how I feel. First scenes that turn out to be a dream bug me. I'm still trying to get my bearings in this world of yours and you go and throw me for a loop? No thank you. Also, not that I'm the cliche police or anything...but starting off with a dream sequence is pretty high on that list of writing cliches. (Like I mentioned in my post, Just a Dream, if your whole book is based completely around dreams, go ahead and disregard that.)
--Grab me and don't let go
If the first page is full of super-machine gun battles (which are ten times cooler than normal, boring machine gun battles), ninjas, and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks, keep that up. Don't have the next few pages be about the MC moving magnets on their refrigerator. It's okay to slow the pace down a little, but don't bring it to a complete stop.
--What now?
Like I said earlier, leave me with a handful of questions that desperately need answers. And not silly questions like, "Hey...did I leave the iron on?" That's like spending a weekend watching my Chia pet grow. Readers are curious little devils. If you leave them with a bunch of serious, potentially life-changing questions, they'll keep flipping pages until they get their answers.
For those who skipped to the end:
*Grab us right away with something interesting.
*Give us some action, even if it's just hinted at.
*Give the reader something to connect with the MC about.
*Start off with something solid (NOT a dream).
*If you've got a fast pace going, don't slow down.
*Leave me with some unanswered questions.
What did you think of the examples?
Which did you find most/least compelling?
What do you think makes a strong first scene?
If the first scene is boring, will you keep reading?
HAPPY WRITING, LOVELIES!
Your first scene needs to grab the reader and shake them, demanding they read the rest. It's got to be powerful and compelling, but it's also got to make us care about the MC and their problems. It's got to draw us in, make us care, and compel us forward in the story. Whoo...sounds like a doozy, huh?
What makes your first scene awesome?
--Grab us quickly
It's best to put something interesting in the first few sentences to give the reader an impression of what to expect from the story. Something that catches their attention and makes them ask questions. (If they've got questions, they'll probably want answers.) I grabbed a few books from my room before starting, so let's take a look at their first few sentences.
"Something heavy on my center, smooth against my skin, shifting very slightly within itself, stretched and retracted. Occasionally a tap to the side, always in the same spot. I breathed. Instantly the thing was still." THE GARDEN by Elsie V. Aidinoff.
This works for me. I want to know what this "thing" is and why it's on the MC. Based purely on this, I would read on.
"After looking everywhere in the house, Alayna found Kiera in the barn, talking to the horses. Alayna knew that--given the chance--most children of five years would talk to horses. But Kiera was crying, sobbing, her voice coming out in gasps and hiccups, barely able to get the words out, and what she was saying to the horses was 'No, I'm sorry. I couldn't tell. But something terrible.'" THE BOOK OF MORDRED by Vivian Vande Velde.
What's wrong with the little girl? Why's she crying? What's she talking about? What's terrible? With so many questions that need answering, of course I'd keep reading!
"'I see...' said the vampire thoughtfully, and slowly he walked across the room towards the window. For a long time he stood there against the dim light from Divisadero Street and the passing beams of traffic. The boy could see the furnishings of the room more clearly now, the round oak table, the chairs." INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE by Anne Rice.
Sorry, Anne, but this is a no-go. Had I just picked this up at a book store, I probably would've put it back down. I actually have read it and, while a little flowery and over-written in place, I do really love the book. But these first few sentences don't give me any sense of approaching action/danger/compelling stuff.
"Double history on a Wednesday afternoon--total nightmare! A few minutes ago, I would have said I couldn't imagine anything worse. But when there's a knock at the door, and it opens, and I spot my Mom outside, I realize--life can always get worse." LORD LOSS by Darren Shan.
Oooh! How can life always get worse? What's going to happen? Also, you see how this started with the MC talking about his distaste for double history periods? That's something teenagers (the target audience) can relate to. Way to go! Now I feel connected to the MC!
"My name is Nicolette Dazincourt DeLande, and I have committed murder. How do you synopsize a life, I wonder, cut it back and down, hacking into it like an untamed wisteria, rampant with lavender blooms, tendrils all coiled around and choking. How do you trim and clip the lush foliage of a life, making it docile and compliant, conformed to a foreign shape and structure." BETRAYAL by Gwen Hunter.
Oh yeah! You had me at "and I have committed murder." Great job, Miss Hunter. You've pulled me in right off the bat. And then you come at me with this awesomely pretty language?! I can't read on quick enough!
--Let's see some action
I love fast-paced, action-packed stories. So when the action kicks off on the first page, it makes for a very happy Kristina. I can't stand a book that spends its first few pages doing nothing but giving back story and descriptions. That being said, it's perfectly fine to just hint at the action, but at least let me know it's on its merry little way.
--Make a connection
Give me something to connect with the MC on. Like in LORD LOSS with Grubbs calling his double history period a "nightmare." With his opinion and the way he put it out there, I could tell right away that I would like Grubbs. While I actually enjoyed history in school, I knew how he felt and could sympathize with his double history problem.
--Give me something to sink my teeth into
So don't start out with a dream. Sorry, but that's how I feel. First scenes that turn out to be a dream bug me. I'm still trying to get my bearings in this world of yours and you go and throw me for a loop? No thank you. Also, not that I'm the cliche police or anything...but starting off with a dream sequence is pretty high on that list of writing cliches. (Like I mentioned in my post, Just a Dream, if your whole book is based completely around dreams, go ahead and disregard that.)
--Grab me and don't let go
If the first page is full of super-machine gun battles (which are ten times cooler than normal, boring machine gun battles), ninjas, and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks, keep that up. Don't have the next few pages be about the MC moving magnets on their refrigerator. It's okay to slow the pace down a little, but don't bring it to a complete stop.
--What now?
Like I said earlier, leave me with a handful of questions that desperately need answers. And not silly questions like, "Hey...did I leave the iron on?" That's like spending a weekend watching my Chia pet grow. Readers are curious little devils. If you leave them with a bunch of serious, potentially life-changing questions, they'll keep flipping pages until they get their answers.
For those who skipped to the end:
*Grab us right away with something interesting.
*Give us some action, even if it's just hinted at.
*Give the reader something to connect with the MC about.
*Start off with something solid (NOT a dream).
*If you've got a fast pace going, don't slow down.
*Leave me with some unanswered questions.
What did you think of the examples?
Which did you find most/least compelling?
What do you think makes a strong first scene?
If the first scene is boring, will you keep reading?
HAPPY WRITING, LOVELIES!
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